Angela Miller Can Get It And America Knows It – JM Rated A 10

Listen I know I’m about a month late to the ball here but I finally watched Angela Miller perform her original piece and wow. I don’t watch American Idol, I haven’t since season 1 when my mother basically made me considering I was still living at home at the time. Anyways, a couple weeks ago my sister was ranting and raving about this chick on American Idol saying she was incredible and shit. I completely ignored her because I have better things to do than watch pointless YouTube videos, oh wait never mind. However, finally tonight I got around to watching this gorgeous girl crush her original song called ‘Set Me Free’ and holy tits, it’s good. She absolutely crushes the vocals, the lyrics themselves are pretty empowering too; I can’t say enough about it. And let’s not forget that this chick is gorgeous too.

Let me state my rating scale. I’d rate her as a sure fire 10. Now is she the hottest girl in the world no, so I’m guessing your wondering how I can rate her a 11 then. Well my system goes like this: body gets rated 1-5, face rated 1-5, and personality gets a bonus of 1 point on your final score as does sexiness and intangibles.  If a chick has the worst personality in American but she’s a sure fire smoke she is an 9 (Body 5, Face 5, personality -1, no status on sexiness or intangibles). Yes, technically a chick can be be rated a 13 but that’s very difficult. There’s not many in this world. I’m also not apposed to giving partial points but it doesn’t happen often.

Angela Miller Rated:

Face: 3 – Very pretty face but you can tell she is susceptible to acne. Also a little less makeup would probably bring out her natural beauty.

Body: 4 – Absolutely love the body from what I can tell. She seems to have boobs on the smaller side, ass looks tight but again for what I’m working with she’s got a banging bo.

Personality: 1 – Love this chicks personality. Seems very down to earth.

Sexiness: 1 – Something about this chick makes me absolutely need to stuff her. I think it’s the way she rocked those silver heels in the audition.

Intangibles: 1 – Has a gorgeous voice. You can’t teach that type of talent.

Overall Score: 10

What Color Am I Today? – Screamin’ Green

 

Quick post here. I’m about to go to lunch and my body is absolutely starving. Although I’m begging for some buffalo fingers and fries I’ll probably settle for a delicious house salad little to no dressing topped with a grilled piece of chicken. Yum. Some chick at work today asked if I had caught the gay today because I’ve been eating healthy and been taken my vitamins. Shit, I guess if I’m starting to look and act like a gay man then I’m doing something right. Everyone knows the gays have great hygiene, tight bodies, great hair and chicks drip over their style. So if you pair that combination with my willingness to destroy the female anatomy, you’ve got the perfect storm. Maybe being fit isn’t so bad after all.

I Don’t Care What You Think, I Love SimCity And I’m Playing The New One

Call me a nerd, tell me I’m a loser, I don’t care for your hush words, I’ll still be playing SimCity. I’m not one of those kids that’s stands in line for any game to come out, actually I don’t stand in line period. It’s one of my biggest pet peeves, I refuse to stand in any line at any time. That’s here nor there, this is about SimCity 5 that was released today on PC. I grew up playing this game. As a small child one of my first video games was SimCity 2000 and I was addicted to say the least. I would play for hours on end into the dark of night. Sometimes I would set my alarm for 3am so I could get up early and play without my mother knowing. I’ve had all the versions up to this date including SimCity 3000 and SimCity 4. As many other kids, I would build a huge metropolis then send the wrath of a 1000 suns down on my city just to kill people. Tornadoes  Earthquakes, UFOs, whatever it may be and just beat the piss out of my citizens. It was rather cruel but I brought them in this world, so I can take them out.

Saying that, I’ll definitely be dabbling in this new Sim City. I doubt I put nearly as much time in this one but I’ve heard some incredible things. The graphics are unreal, now you can add curved roads and connecting cities is much easier than it used to be. No longer do you have to build dumb ass power lines or put pipes under ground, all that jazz is taken care of through the roads. My imagination can run wild with this new installment. Keep talking shit, I’m excited and I’m not scared to admit it.

What Color Am I Today? – Yellow

 

Not often do I have a bad Thursday. It’s something about Thursday’s that always seem positive to me, hell it may be my favorite day of the week. Saying that today is another good day. No issues at work, I’m actually leaving early because we have a team lunch/dinner to talk about our direction in these next couple months. That means we eat, talk for 10 minutes, then everyone makes excuses why they can’t stay any long and we all go home. Free food, short day and booze. Days like this remind me of elementary school when you had an early release. The best feeling ever, you get to go to your friends house, eat junk food and play video games. Life was so simple then.

Other than that, it’s a light day on the agenda. Today passes tomorrows another day.

I Don’t Know If This Actually Works But I Want It Now

This type of technology is absolutely incredible. I need this gadget and I need it yesterday. Sure it probably doesn’t work 50% of that time but come on the mouse is so outdated.  I should be able to move the muscles in my arm and control my computer and phone. Imagine using that on porn sites…. Nothing worse than getting to spot that you hate and you have to click forward. Just twist the arm a little and fast forward, or snap to pause for that perfect shot. I’m in, tell me where to sign.

P.s. Using that thing to play a game is dumb. I play video games to not move and not sweat.

What Color Am I Today? – Antique Brass

Misery loves company. If you’re having a bad day, keep reading, if you’re having a good day, eat shit and move along. I don’t want your positive, fun, happy attitude around these grave sites today. I’m miserable. 1. It’s Monday 2. I’ve had to respond to about 300 emails because of some of my employees are children and can’t get along. Due to the 300+ issues I’ve had to talk to HR way too many times and write way too many reports. All I want is this day to be over and over right now. I’m on lunch at 230pm, do you understand how hungry I am? And I don’t plan on going back for at least a hour or so. I think I’m going to administer a no talk rule on Mondays, maybe add in no phone calls or emails either. Everyone just sits in silence and gets their shit done. If you have an issue, wait till tomorrow. If you can’t wait, tell your problems to Jesus.

On a happy note I have a hockey game tonight. So that mean I get to skate, drink beers and talk nonsense for a good 2 hours. Things are looking up.

Do I Love Or Hate This Video?

Listen I have no filter. I do, say whatever I want when I want because I feel there is comedy in that. My friends love me for it, my girl tolerates it and my mother hates it. This video is tough to gauge here. How do I know he didn’t do 6000 of these and just cut it up to the 20 or so people that said yes. I guess I will never know but what I do know is this guys attitude is top notch. He walks up to chicks, calls it like he sees it, doesn’t pay really any attention to them and boom they’re dripping for more. You can’t hate the hustle, he came, he spit and he conquered  This is what everyone should do in  a bar, just come out guns a blazing. No beating around the bush. Usually my confrontation with chicks go something like this.

I’m not scared to have a good time. You interested?

9 times out of 10, I get shut down but that 1 time, that 1 time is all you need and you’re ruffling the sheets with some minx. Although now I might just say, hey put your number in my phone. No gimmicks, just clean and direct like my favorite porno’s.

Get Your Tie Length Right, You Look Like An Idiot

The guy on the right looks like an idiot, the guy on the left (Merril Hoge) looks like a bigger idiot. 

Til this day, I don’t get how men walk outside without their Ties the proper length. It’s probably one of my biggest pet peeves on another human being, right up there with a uni brow. Every guy should know that the perfect tie length is when the tip hits your belt buckle. It’s a cut and dry subject, black and white, there’s no grey area. I don’t care if your wearing a skinny tie, regular tie or old school fat ties, just get your damn length right.

The ‘too long tie’ pisses me off but the ‘half way up your stomach’ tie takes the cake. How in your right mind can you think a tie that literally is touching your sternum is a good look. It looks like a tiny leash that your owner puts on you to keep you close. It’s just disgusting to say the least. The minute I see a mis-length tie guy, I lose complete respect for him. He may as well be homeless, actually that’s an insult to the homeless, they have more style than you. No guy can or will ever be able to pull off the short tie look. If you think that look is ‘hotness’ you should be shot plain and simple.

P.s. Anyone that ties their tie the correct length but has the other end behind the tie longer than the front. you fit in with the rest of these morons. Never should the back be longer than the front. I don’t care what your excuse it, make the damn knot bigger.

What Color Am I Today? – Neon Carrot

 

Neon Carrot – I’m feeling bright today but still dull as the taste of a carrot.

Today is going to be a good day. My To Do list is rather long but there’s nothing that excited me more than crossing off things from my list. Just something about achieving your goals for the day that makes you feel good. I kind of cheat though, I always put some arbitrary things on the list just so I can easily cross them off. For instance one of those is, ‘make breakfast’. I mean come on, you gotta eat right.

My hangover if finally over which is a win for everyone. I’ll be weighing in today which should be disappointing, considering I don’t feel any better or worse. So, I’m going to be telling myself, today is a good day even if I’m lying.

 

iPhone Needs To Change This ASAP

(Left side regular texting vs right side iMessanger)

There is nothing more irritating than texting someone on your iPhone that has Android. Listen I love Android, I had it for years but recently switched to iPhone for a change. I’m indifference to be honest, they are both great, both have their pros and cons but this isn’t about that. This is about Apple’s utter disrespect for my texting game. How do you go from putting this beautiful blue in iMessanger to a nasty lime booger green when you are using normal text messaging. It’s just humiliating to look at and quite frankly it throws my flow right out the window. I tell you this, if a chick give me her number and as I’m inputting into a new text message window, if that little ‘send’ button doesn’t turn blue… I’m out. She’s already lost on me because without me even saying a word I’m rattled. My game is based off of confidence and the lime green shreds that to pieces. So how am I supposed to approach her now, my hearts already bumping, steams coming out of my ears. I’m already a beaten man at that point. iPhone needs to fix this and it needs to be fix yesterday.

I’ll tell you something even worse. Sometimes you’re in a conversation and the iPhone decides it can’t send an iMessage even though they have an iPhone. So, with no regard to human beings it just send a normal nasty lime green text message. Ohh shit, do I lose it. That moment right then is like when your mom walked in on you jerking off. It’s a god damn buzz kill and your gun shy for at least a week. By help me god if this doesn’t get fixed I’ll go back to chatting on AIM. All that shit was customizable.