Mentally Challenged Guy Owns Restaurant And I Respect His Hustle

This guy seems nice enough and I truly believe he’s genuine with his restaurant hugs. Saying that, I know this guys just playing the game to earn that guap and I’ll be damned if I don’t respect his hustle. Tim’s Place must have a customer satisfactions of 99% because you tell me one person that’s going to complain about anything there. You complain at Timmy’s you have a one way ticket to hell. ‘Hey my food took 80 minutes and I didn’t even get what I ordered but hey I’m at Timmy’s Place. No problem I’ll eat it anyways.’ ‘Oh I just got a hair in my food.’ Timmy would come over pick it out, he’d tell you it’s OK it’s only my hair and give you a hug. Any other place you’d be demanding a free meal for life because of you unsatisfied needs but at Timmy’s you’d look like an asshole taking advantage of him. You could order a medium rare steak then it comes out looking like a hockey puck and you’d still eat it while saying it was the best damn cow you’ve ever eaten. His hugs when he greets you at the door negate anything and everything that happens inside those walls. Like I said the ultimate hustle for a restaurant.

That 1% that does complain is obviously other retards. They are ruthless too each other, especially if on is jealous, all bets are off. Timmy’s making cash and these other brotards are slinging playdough against the walls. It will be a spit fest in that joint if Timmy and Arnold start having words. Timmy would probably take a frying pan and bash it over Arnold’s head for disrespecting his spot. No one messes with Timmy and I mean no one.

P.s. In all seriousness Timmy seems legit but definitely shady.

I’ll Admit I Feel Small Next To A Tall Girl

So I’m sitting at the bar having a beer last night with my buddy and we get a conversation going with 2 girls next to us. Both were about 7s, not anything spectacular but definitely bangable. Actually one which I’m going to be talking about was absolutely ‘take home to mom’ status. Moving on, the girl that you could take home excused herself to go to the bathroom and to my surprise she was mega tall. I’d say in the ballpark off 5’11. I can’t say 6′ but she definetly wasn’t 5’10” (my height). It brought up this discussion between me and my buddy about ‘Could you date a girl taller than you.’ He’s about 5’9″ and he was all bent out of shape about it, saying why not if she’s smoking enough. But come on, do you really want to look up at your girlfriend? That shit is humiliating.

The way I see it is she needs to be 2 inches minimum smaller than me however, I’d prefer 3. The logic is of course then she can wear 3 inch heels and still not be taller than me and I can have some dignity. Sure she could wear 4 inch heels, but everyone knows if a chick is getting up that high she’s either dating a black guy or she’s a whore. Most likely both. When a chick is taller than me, I feel small not just in stature but my self worth and maturity. I’ll even go as far as saying I wont talk to a girl that’s 5’9 or taller. She has no use to me, she mind as well be 350 with pimples all over her body because I’m not going anywhere near her.

Ok of course I’d bang a tall chick but that’s not saying much. And if any brings up Bar’s height, let me just say she’s listed at 5’8.5″ and everyone knows that height is like when your listed in your high school sports program. I was 5’11 180 when in reality I was only 5’8″ and 160.

Preach Pastor Preach

(I give God 10%, Why do you get 18.) – That’s as classic as it gets

Talk about a Pastor that balls so hard huh. Do you think he gives a shit about 18%. This guy lives by the book and only gives 10% to God. Do you blame this guy for being a miserable old fuck, cause I don’t. Think about his life, he gets paid nothing to preach to people that only go to Church because they ‘believe’ it’ll save them from Hell. And if that’s not enough he as to listen to these self-righteous assholes ‘repent their sins’. Another day, another slut going to confession to apologize for blowing Ken the drug dealer for an ounce of rock. All the while he’s thinking ‘Can I get a blow here? I’ve been celibate my whole life and I’m fucking miserable’. Sure the guy signed up to be Priest but can we give him ONE Sunday off. It’s supposed to be a day of rest but my man Pastor Paul over here can’t sleep in on a Sunday to save his life. I feel bad for the guy, not only shouldn’t he have to tip but he should get his meal free. Hook a brother up or at least give a rub and a tug. Not like it matters if it’s a boy or girl waiter, we all know Priests be swingin’.

Eating Dirt Is All The Rage

 

So I’m reading Yahoo News and long story short this Japanese Restaurant just decided to make shit with dirt in it. What the hell is wrong with people? Everyone is so against conforming that they will do anything to be different. But putting DIRT in your food? That’s just disgusting. I don’t care how eccentric you are trying to make it, you will never convince me to eat dirt. I guess I shouldn’t be too surprised considering it’s the Japanese and they eat dogs, cats, and whatever else has a heartbeat. What’s next, are we going to eat feces or fetus’s? ‘Hey Li, I took big poop, smell like rat died. Don’t worry I saved you some and put it in your cat soup. Enjoy.’