Nothing really has come around my screen today that I’ve felt blog worthy. I mean I don’t really search for anything anyways so that could be the problem but regardless when in doubt post hot girls dancing. I could watch this all day. Those asses, those bodies, the heaven they bring down to earth is absolutely incredible. Dial me up and let me watch that shit all day.
P.s. I didn’t watch this video with sound on so I have no idea what they are dancing to.
Listen I know I’m about a month late to the ball here but I finally watched Angela Miller perform her original piece and wow. I don’t watch American Idol, I haven’t since season 1 when my mother basically made me considering I was still living at home at the time. Anyways, a couple weeks ago my sister was ranting and raving about this chick on American Idol saying she was incredible and shit. I completely ignored her because I have better things to do than watch pointless YouTube videos, oh wait never mind. However, finally tonight I got around to watching this gorgeous girl crush her original song called ‘Set Me Free’ and holy tits, it’s good. She absolutely crushes the vocals, the lyrics themselves are pretty empowering too; I can’t say enough about it. And let’s not forget that this chick is gorgeous too.
Let me state my rating scale. I’d rate her as a sure fire 10. Now is she the hottest girl in the world no, so I’m guessing your wondering how I can rate her a 11 then. Well my system goes like this: body gets rated 1-5, face rated 1-5, and personality gets a bonus of 1 point on your final score as does sexiness and intangibles. If a chick has the worst personality in American but she’s a sure fire smoke she is an 9 (Body 5, Face 5, personality -1, no status on sexiness or intangibles). Yes, technically a chick can be be rated a 13 but that’s very difficult. There’s not many in this world. I’m also not apposed to giving partial points but it doesn’t happen often.
Angela Miller Rated:
Face: 3 – Very pretty face but you can tell she is susceptible to acne. Also a little less makeup would probably bring out her natural beauty.
Body: 4 – Absolutely love the body from what I can tell. She seems to have boobs on the smaller side, ass looks tight but again for what I’m working with she’s got a banging bo.
Personality: 1 – Love this chicks personality. Seems very down to earth.
Sexiness: 1 – Something about this chick makes me absolutely need to stuff her. I think it’s the way she rocked those silver heels in the audition.
Intangibles: 1 – Has a gorgeous voice. You can’t teach that type of talent.
Overall Score: 10
I’m not going to sit here and say I can drop a beat better than this guy via ass slaps but I’d love to try. I’ve been slapping chicks asses since my kindergarten days, just walking into coloring time and tapping little miss Sandy on her ass, letting her know I’m present. When I was in 6th grade this little smoke bomb Erin used to walk by my locker 20 times a day, and I used to slap her ass 20 times a day. No joke, she used to absolutely freak, but her ass was so tight and I’ll never forget the day she was wearing a tan mini skirt and I just got my hand underneath, gave her the full palm right to the bare ass cheek. Thinking back that one may have crossed the line, but don’t worry all that slapping was the ground work to me banging her years later.
This guys got pretty decent rhythm, I’ll give him that. He also doesn’t have any false slaps, you know when you go to give a nice palm on some chicks ass but it’s almost like a misfire. That’s the worst. Ass doesn’t connect with the hand correctly and the slap sounds like someone coughed. Just not a good situation for anyone. The girls embarrassed, you sure as hell should be embarrassed, it’s quite possibly the same as having a limp dick. I’ll tell you one thing, the ass second to the right absolutely get’s pounded this whole video. I’d say 88% of the total slaps went to ass 3 counting from the left.
Now if we are rating the asses here, I think you have to go with (counting from the left), ass 2, 1, 3, 4. I like 2 because you can see how curvy she is. Look at the waste then bam her ass pops out. I don’t know it’s a tough game to play, you almost can’t lose minus 4. That ass may be too big to handle, might loose my penis in there. Jeez I could diagnose this video all day. Just so much to be said.
P.s. When I went to Montreal after my 18th birthday, I literally played the Drums on this black stripper chicks ass. She fucking loved, kept saying ‘abuse me, abuse me.’ Love it.
This is all hypothetical since she is 16.
Look at that face. Jiminey Christ I could see myself waking up that every morning. I know she is only 16, which is a blessing in disguise. That gives me 2 years to get my body in tip top shape for my future ex-wife. Those eyes are incredible too, she could probably get me to do anything. Hey honey, can you please clean the dishes? can you make the bed? can you move the house a little? can you actually move the sun? I’d be mush next too her. Sure babe, I’ll move the house, the sun, the god damn earth as long as you don’t leave me. And that’s just her face, her body isn’t something to be played with either. It’s absolutely banging to the highest power, skinny, tone, and probably mega soft too like Charmin Toilet paper. The double ply shit, not that single ply cheapo stuff. Basically her body is everything mine isn’t.
How about this chicks voice too. Just an absolute angel when she sings; I think it’s safe to say she’s going to be a star. Any talents from across the pond usually takes time to get mainstream in America but with dance music becoming so big, and a plethora of DJs from Europe taking over this countries music, she should be on the fast track. She’s better than Ellie Goulding and I absolute love her, so that’s saying a lot. Just throw Zara on a track with Avicii, Benny Benassi or Guetta and she’ll blow up. That’s here nor there, as long as we get married and she serenades me every night, I’ll be quite alright.
The treadmill might be my ultimate arch nemesis, nope…. no, it’s Tony Massarotti, he’s my only true foe but the treadmill is a close second. I’ll get to Tony MAZZ another day. Back to the treadmill. I absolutely dread jumping on that baby eating machine. I get on, I always hit manual because I’ve had issues with all the other ‘presets’ that they think are good for you and I try to just run. But it never works out for me, I’m all over the place, smash the handle bars on my right and left, it’s a miserable experience. Running in one place for more than 2 minutes is nearly impossible, not because it doesn’t feel like you’re going any where but more so, I can’t stay in a straight line. From the day I was born, I have been genetically challenge with I believe the medical term is ‘ding toed’, so when I run I’m all over the damn machine. I can’t fix this issue. I’ve tried to look down and concentrate on my feet and where I’m stepping. That’s just a disaster waiting to happen, I think I get worse because I’m usually one step away from loosing my balance. I’ve also tried just forgetting about my ‘zig-zag’ running style but that causes my feet to hit each other. All this is happening while in my mind I can’t stop pondering what the person next to me is thinking. I know it can’t be good considering his or her thought process is along the line of ‘Is this kid retarded? Poor kid is a safety hazard.’
If all that isn’t bad enough, one day I did use one of the presets labeled ‘CADIO’. Never again. The god damn treadmill had a mind of it’s own. I’m pretty sure the thing was inclining while also increasing speed at a dramatic rate. You’d think the machine would recognize that I was struggling in the first place. Ya sure thing, bump it up to 9.2 when I could barely keep up at 4.5. Then what do you think it does, 20 seconds later it’s hitting the breaks like when you see a cop merge onto the highway. Now not only do I have to worry about my feet, I’m worrying about the gears this thing is putting my through. And lets just ignore the elephant in the room considering I hate running, I can’t run for long periods of time because I’m fat. I quit treadmill, you win.
I don’t want to hate on this kid, I really don’t but there’s just some issues here I can’t ignore. Sure the kids a little fat but he got a decent voice and he laid it down on that song. But come on bro it’s not 2003 its 2013. No one gives a shit about R-Kelly or his Ignition song. R-Kelly pees on girls, is that what you want to be when you grow up? A black guy that pees on little adolescents. Lets find a new role model for you and we can bring that voice to stardom. Why don’t you cover something by JT, the guys back and so hot right now. At least you’d sound somewhat relevant.
P.s. Don’t think I didn’t notice that kids room. A lot of creepy shit in the background there.
P.p.s No chance that kid wasn’t leaking sweat in his hoodie. Who are you fooling bro, just take that shirt off we all know you are dying, plus you’re not in a boy band.
P.p.p.s. Remix to Ignition was fire back in the day.
Permanent Crayon 