Memorial Day Weekend. The beginning of summer, the starting of America’s most beloved season, you just can’t hate this weekend if you tried. Rain or shine we all go outside, BBQ, drink beer and celebrate the next three months of sunshine, beach weather, boat shoes, and tanks. This goes without mentioning women in sundresses, bikinis and mini skirts. I’ll be a case deep today tomorrow and monday, I hope you all follow along. So get outside, grab a brew ah ah and let groove get in.
If you’re looking for a couple jamn for this weekend:
Every year I get into high roller leagues, I set my bracket up and prime it to go 63 and 0 and what happens, round 2 I’m in shambles. I’m not one of those guys who goes upset happy but I figure I watch nearly 700 games, I should have a grasp on what’s going to happen. I don’t know why I play anymore. I sink a 1000+ dollars in leagues and I usually don’t crack the top 20 but this is my year. I can feel it. I know what’s coming, I can predict the field. Of course since I do more than one league I do fill out a few different brackets so on Wednesday night I’ll be posting them so you can see how I’m looking.
To give you an idea where I’m heading, I do like Louisville a lot however if anyone can knock them off it’s Michigan State. Before the selection committee set the brackets I was telling my body that my top 6 teams are Louisville, Michigan St., Indiana, Duke, Kansas and UNC. Now of course I need to trim that down. So for the next 2 days I’ll be killing myself trying to figure out how not to come in last.
P.s. I love Ole Miss. I think they are the ultimate dark horse to make a run this year. Their toughest test will be against Wisconsin in the first round after that they should be able to cruise. And don’t give me that nonsense with Zaga they suck. Also I’m not too concerned about Ohio St.
I hate today. I absolutely incredibly hate today. I don’t want to work, mother-fucking-nature decided to dump a load on us and everyone is miserable at work. All I know is that i have 4 hours left in the day and I couldn’t be happier. But you know what, the minute I get out of work I get to sit in an hour of traffic because once people see snow they forget how to drive and all chaos enthuse. It’s pretty fun. Nothing else on the agenda today. Just pure fake happiness and smiles from this guy. See you on the other side.
P.s. My hangover is almost cured, it’s a remarkable feeling.
This is the type of day I’m having. I watched this from beginning to end and I wasn’t even mad about it. To be honest I’m happy this wasn’t a GIF or I’d probably be glued to my monitor for 24 hour straight. If I could explain my brain right now, this is exactly the video I would show. Simple, slow paced and mesmerizing is actually how I’m feeling right now. A basic wheel just turning, a CC getting crushed, then being dropped into a bucket. Nothing complicated about it, just straight forwards and rather rewarding.
My national holiday has came and went and it’s safe to say, a small part of me died. Having St. Patrick’s Day on a Sunday is God telling us that we have no control over ourselves. Since I was on a long weekend, I blacked out Friday and Saturday which you would think would stop me from going hard again on Sunday but no, I decided that I owed it to my fellow Irish brothers to get back on the horse and destroy my brain cells one more time. Right now my head feels like the equivalent of a boxer who just went 12 rounds and didn’t throw a punch. Just absorbing head shots and body shots all night without any push back. I’m looking at this screen right now and all I’m seeing is snow when your TV cable goes out. My eyes hurt, my head hurts, my leg hurts, my neck hurts, and my stomach is turning. I don’t want to speak because I’m scared my vocals are destroyed from yelling for 3 days straight and I’m mega scared to look at my penis because the girl it had been inside Saturday could of quite possibly been a whore. And I mean that seriously, there’s a legitimate chance she had a pimp. I’m not talking to any of my friends for a least 3 weeks and I refuse to look at my bank account until my next pay check.
I hope the rest of you are having a better Monday than me… Actually no, if you’re not dying today then you’re shifty and I don’t trust your ass.
P.s. It’s incredible how many squiggly red lines I’m seeing right now.
This lady has a talent and I’m not going to deny her of that. Sure if she’s in America we would cuff her and throw her in the clink for illegally putting flyers in peoples mailboxes but this is probably in one of those Asian Countries, no rules there. She’s just trying to expand her nail and spa salon. Nothing wrong with that. Asians are crazy huh, not only do they making robots and shit, they act like them too. This woman is an absolute machine; I should hire her to pass out flyers with my website on them. I’d probably receive a million or so hits in the first month of her distributing. You know what else I was thinking too, did Asia invent Spam? Everything they do seems like Spam to me. From their flyers to forcing you to eat their Umi Chicken at the mall. They get right up in your face, ‘ you want chicken, take chicken, you like this chicken.’ It’s pretty impressive. I always cave.
There’s no doubt about this technology… it’s incredible and revolutionary to say the least. You can record your life in first person while also staying in touch with everything digital like weather, airlines and whatever else they haven’t shown. It’s like having facetime on your face letting whoever you’re talking to see everything your doing. All sick shit when you think about it but when there’s this much good there has to be bad.
These glasses are going to be banned in places without a doubt. You can’t walk into a bank and just start recording shit. They’ll literally give you the opportunity to case any place at any time. It’s like a thieves heaven to have these things. How about girls? If you see any guys with these on you have to assume they are video taping you, your tits and ass while your walking down the street. Or imagine this scenario, a chicks about to bang this bro and he throws these on real quick. She’s doggy style he’s pounding from behind and she’s un the wiser that’s he’s taping the whole thing. Before she knows it he’s already uploaded it to the internet and he hasn’t even busted yet.
You could think of 1000 different things why these glasses are going to be an issue. I say within 3 days of them being released someone abuses the Google Glass technology. Hell I know I’d be corrupt as a mother fucker with these things. Video taping everyone I see on the subway, streets and bar. It’s a bloggers dream. Right now I have to pretend I’m texting someone while trying to take a picture of some fat slob just hoping my flash doesn’t go off. Google Glass revolutionizing the blogging game.
P.s. I don’t know how long the video can last but if it’s hours I’m recording myself in first person while drunk. I think it’s the first thing I’d do when I got them. Who hasn’t wondered what happened one night while you were blacked out. No more questions on, how did I get here? Who is this girl? What am I wearing? Why am I naked? All questions answered when you’re recording your whole night.
I told you this was going to happen. When I blogged about it last week, I said this Harlem Shake phenomenon is going to get OOC. And what is happening, everyone and their mother is making a parody. I can’t handle it. I’m having ‘Call me maybe’ flashbacks already. NEXT!
Neon Carrot – I’m feeling bright today but still dull as the taste of a carrot.
Today is going to be a good day. My To Do list is rather long but there’s nothing that excited me more than crossing off things from my list. Just something about achieving your goals for the day that makes you feel good. I kind of cheat though, I always put some arbitrary things on the list just so I can easily cross them off. For instance one of those is, ‘make breakfast’. I mean come on, you gotta eat right.
My hangover if finally over which is a win for everyone. I’ll be weighing in today which should be disappointing, considering I don’t feel any better or worse. So, I’m going to be telling myself, today is a good day even if I’m lying.
… So get drunk, get laid, get stupid or whatever floats your boat. I’ll be posting here and there this weekend but more importantly I’ll be back in full force Monday. Don’t forget I’ll be weighing in either Monday or Tuesday. I haven’t decided yet but most likely Tuesday so be sure to see if I’ve gained weight or lost some.
We had a good week, we deserve the time off so make the most of it and don’t be scared to get weird.
Permanent Crayon 